I wrote the following message almost ten years ago. This is significant because I made a promise to myself about how my life would be ten years from that time. When you've finished reading, I will reveal how history repeated itself in my life just this past weekend.
May 3, 2010
Ever since I stepped out on faith to pursue writing full time, I have been making a point to attend events and engage in activities that add to my life in a positive way…personal development if you will. Attending workshops, seminars and expos, reading motivational books, and even meeting with people that I consider to be mentor material, has become a regular part of my schedule. These practices help me to remain positive, productive, and constantly immersed in the process of growth.
One night, I attended an event called “Ladies Can We Talk.” The event was hosted by motivational speaker and author Lisa Nichols as a part of her promotional tour for the Chicken Soup for the African American Woman’s Soul anthology. I went in totally expecting that I would be fed a lecture style motivational speech. To my surprise it was very interactive and all of the participants added value to the experience. There was standing room only because while the organizers had anticipated 200, there were 326 in attendance including a few men.
Throughout the evening we had to do several activities with a partner. I felt like I’d been strategically placed with the exact person that I needed to connect with. Before I even knew that this woman was going to be my partner I’d noticed her. She was very pretty and well dressed. “Now there is a woman that’s got herself together,” I thought. During the activities we were told to sit face to face and knee to knee. It was slightly uncomfortable at first, but the facilitators had warned us in advance that our comfort level would be significantly challenged.
Once we began to share deep truths about ourselves with one another I realized that my reflection had been placed before me. I was looking at my reflection literally and figuratively. This woman’s features were very similar to my own, so much so, that if we told people that we were biologically related, no one would protest or give it a second thought. It was like looking in a mirror that reflected me ten years into the future.
This woman was ten years my senior, but was experiencing many of the issues that I was dealing with during that time. This outwardly beautiful and polished woman suffered from the exact same insecurities that I had. Like me, she had gotten into relationships at a very young age and somehow missed the very important developmental stages of autonomy and self efficacy. That is, knowing and loving one’s self.
I feel like I was shown what my life would be like in the future if I continued to neglect to know and love myself. I was shown how my life would be if I rushed into marriage without first engaging in a committed relationship with myself. While I don’t think that this woman or her life is bad, I know that it is not where I want to be. This was confirmed for me when she communicated to me that she didn’t want to be there either, and it was her life.
We may not always literally hear or see what we need to learn about life and ourselves, but that still small voice speaks to us through people and circumstances. I felt so connected to this woman that I had never met in my life before that day. I believe it’s safe to say that she experienced the same feeling of connection to me. I also believe that she would give anything to be in the position that I am in, where I still have the chance and the choice to change the course of my life and my thinking while I am still young. I will use the wisdom that she imparted upon me to inform my decisions and behaviors because I owe it to her, and to myself.
So pay attention to those that cross your path because they are placed there for a reason. Perhaps your mirror messenger will answer that burning question that you’ve always wanted answered. So be still and patient and surround yourself with positive energy in the meantime.
*** Fast forward to this past weekend, almost ten years later. I met a delightful young lady who was several years younger than me. As we shared our stories, we both realized that in many ways, she was just like me when I was her age. I'm proud to say that I was able to tell her that even though our choices may take us in some dark directions, getting back on the path of personal work and staying that course will reap unimaginable benefits. I was her mirror, and I was able to show her what is possible. I kept my promise to myself and hopefully inspired someone else, a younger version of me, in the process.
This week I challenge you to reflect on the connections you've made, and pay attention to the people you meet. What is the message or lesson that you have come to bring for one another? What is your mirror trying to tell you?
I am surrounded by souls who guide me where I am meant to go.
I am living a life that my younger self would thank me for.
I am illuminated by loving light along my journey.
Master Your Mind + Master Your Body + Master Your Money = Manifest a Life You Love
Monica Marie Jones Your Soul Journey Guide www.MonicaMarieJones.com